Why Can’t We Stop Asking Why?

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My sister started a blog and my entire family is dumbfounded.

Let me start again.

I have a sister. She is loveable, genuine, hilarious and full of life. If you’ve ever met my sister no doubt you’ve fallen immediately in love with her. Trust me, I’ve seen it happen time and time again. From fitness classes to a Sephora consultant, Danielle attracts people towards her like no one else I’ve ever seen. It is a running joke between us and when I tease her about it I do so with the utmost admiration.

But what my sister isn’t is open. What my sister doesn’t do well is put herself in a vulnerable situation. What my sister hates is sharing anything about herself. Until now.

My sister started a blog and my entire family is dumbfounded. We love it. But we are curious creatures.

“Where is this coming from?” I ask my mom.

“I’m not sure, you think I can ask her?”

And then we both laugh. No. Do not ask her to share more than she is willing.

Why is that so hard? Why is the fact that she started something not enough? Why do we need to dig for the whys in everything? Why can’t we just leave it be and be satisfied with the answers in front of us?

Think of all the things you’ve asked why about. Have you gotten the answers? Did you really need them?

I remember when I got divorced just a year and a half after getting married strangers and friends alike wanted to know why. Why? Why? Why? It drove them, and myself, crazy. Why did that happen? Why did you fall out of love? Why didn’t you know sooner?

The whys didn’t help me, so why did others feel it would help them? It took me many months, and hours of therapy, to let the why go. I remember the day I asked it for the last time. I sat across from a good friend and asked for the millionth time; “Marsha, why did I fall out of love?” “It worked until it didn’t.” She answered quite simply.

Those five words set me free. There was no answer. The why was redundant because the question was the answer. I fell out of love. End of story.

Of course some digging was necessary on my part to fully understand my situation, but only I needed those answers. And I never did get all of them. Some things I’ve had to let go. Other things I’ve had to trust I’d learn over time. As for everyone else – I don’t owe them a why. No more than my sister owes me a why. No more than any of us owes the rest of us an explanation they are not ready to give; if they even have one in the first place.

My sister started a blog. Why open up now? I have no idea, nor do I need one to read and appreciate what my sister is willing to share. I suggest you do the same – follow her here.

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3 thoughts on “Why Can’t We Stop Asking Why?

  1. i made the blog…lol lol lol…thanks lil sis…mom already tried by saying “if you ever wanna talk 1:1 you know, i’m here”…i responded “no talk. just read.”…tell the dumbfounded peeps, the why isn’t answered yet…but the timing seemed right…s’gonna be a changen day – insert accent…

  2. I had the same questions directed towards me when I started to introduce hot yoga into North America. And now I have all the gold chains and rolls royces I could imagine (actually I could use a few more). Yours, Bikram

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